What are you thankful for?

OK. For the grammarians, I know that it is improper to finish a sentence with a preposition. This should be entitled “For What Are You Thankful?” I’m not always that proper.

I do, however, get very annoyed when I overhear someone say over the phone “Where are you at?” That is like fingernails on a chalkboard to me. But I digress.

It is Thanksgiving, a uniquely American holiday and tradition. Though strongly rooted in Christian values and supported by images of gentle pious pilgrims breaking bread with Native Americans, the idea of thankfulness and gratefulness seems to be a universal value across all cultures and religions and perhaps even across the animal kingdom.

In Spanish it’s gracias. In Mandarin it’s xie xie. The Hawaiians say Mahalo. My chocolate lab, Ruby, can’t talk but says thank you with a full body tail wag whenever I bring her food or offer to throw the tennis ball for her.

Kids. We have to teach them the importance of saying thank you. Most get it from good guidance at home. Some seem to forget their manners at times, but I’m afraid we adults do send them mixed messages. The thank you is supposed to be attached to appreciation. If you don’t genuinely feel appreciation, the thank you doesn’t naturally pop in your head. Often we expect them to say thank you when someone has done something for them, but they weren’t really asking for it.

Say thank you to the dentist for stretching your mouth like a wide mouth frog? I don’t think so. Say thank you to the gym teacher for only making you do 20 push ups? Probably not. Say thank you to the barber for making you look just like your father and getting hair down your shirt? Thanks for nothing.

Still, I find as I visit our schools that children are more apt than not to say thank you at appropriate times, when they know they have been indeed given a gift. A compliment, a few extra minutes on the play ground, a snack, an opportunity to feel special and important – all will bring a quick thank you from even the rudest of kids.

Recently, I asked one of our new principals if he found our students to be different in any way from the students where he last worked. He answered, “Absolutely. The students here are polite. They look you in the eye and say good morning. They hold the door for you. They appear to be comfortable chatting with adults.”

I have much to be thankful for. I have a loving wife and healthy kids. I have a job I love in a community with a great quality of life. But it is hard to beat the grateful feeling of knowing that our kids are turning out OK; that they can treat each other with respect and compassion; that they can carry on a coherent conversation with an adult; that they know and value the idea of community service. And they know how to say “Thank You.”